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Can I lose fat and build muscle mass at the same time?

A friend of mine and I were disagreeing about this point and I thought maybe you could help. I have heard that it is not possible to both lose fat and build muscle mass simultaneously: ideally, a person should do cardiovascular exercise with dieting to lose extra body fat, and then start to focus on building up muscle mass. He says it's possible to both burn fat and build up muscle over the same period of time. Which is the case?


How do I learn to love?

I don't know what love is. My family thinks it's a kind of trade, or reciprocity. If they do for me, they demand "love" in return. I'm pretty sure that isn't love. I'm an adult now, and have no desire to be indebted to anyone, hence I don't pursue relationships. But I'm pretty sure love isn't reciprocity, and I know I've never felt love. How does one go about learning to love?


Why do I crave sweet things?

I try to eat a piece of fruit for dessert after a meal; however, when I have substituted after-meal sweet cravings with fruit, I still end up craving some other type of sweets (i.e., candy, chocolate, ice cream.) It seems that after every meal, I can't feel satisfied until I have eaten something of this food category. I do try to listen to my body and this appears to be programmed into my mind telling my body it is wanting this food consistently. Can you provide any explanation as I am trying to lose weight and this type of food is empty calories and unhealthy? I work out six days a week and have recently given up smoking.


Are waxy fruits safe to eat?

I get the apples provided in the dining hall on campus every day and have noticed that they are completely coated with wax (scratching the surface produces white flakes). I was wondering, how harmful is the wax if I eat two or three apples a day?


Can I determine whether my girlfriend is a virgin?

I had my first sexual experience with my girlfriend a few months ago. She told me she was a virgin, but after having intercourse, I didn't believe her and was hurt. She didn't seem to be in any pain, there was no bleeding, and there was no hymen. She makes up all these excuses like "not all girls have them." Should I believe her? Is there a sure-fire way of determining whether or not I was her first? It is making me angry. Can you ease my pain?


How can my long-distance girlfriend and I improve communication?

My girlfriend and I have been dating long distance for about seven months. I have found out through keen observation and affirmation from an old roommate of hers that she is a rape victim. For the last three months or so she has been going through a lot of changes with job acquisition, living conditions, and I don't know what else. In this time, communication between us has grown to an insignificant level (in my opinion). It seems as though she is putting her job, spiritual drive, personal life, etc before me. Almost to the point that she doesn't want to include me. I think this has something to do with the rape issue and her ability to trust people. I think she may be unable to believe that I could love her unconditionally.

I have been thinking my situation over and don't know what to do. I love her with all my heart but I am receiving virtually nothing from this relationship right now. Do I hold on to her and give her the space to come to grips with her life and hope that I will be in the big picture later on, or do I end it on the condition that she needs time for herself to decide if I am an important part of her future life? Please respond because I'm crawling out of my skin.